I bet you were expecting "I touch myself".
We have been living together for 13 years now, and the number 13 might be unlucky to some but not to me. It means that we've been sharing a life for over 1/3 of the time we've been on this planet together. Next month celebrates 14 years since I first saw your gorgeous blue eyes, since I first knew without a doubt you were the man for me. It was as if there was an angel (not Trey) tapping me on the shoulder saying "Pay attention, this is THE one". Despite my obviously poor choice that evening, by the next afternoon I was telling Sarah "I think I like him". I have no idea why I told my dad just a few days later that I'd met the man I was going to marry. The angel on my shoulder was the one dialing the phone because I sure as hell couldn't remember the phone number.
That first year was tough, I wanted to be so perfect for you. You were so patient with me, and I doubt either one of us realized I was in a deep depression. Still, as frustrating as that must of been for you, you loved me. ME!!! Some days I still can't believe my luck.
The past 14 years have been amazing. We were just 20 years old--not even old enough to drink. We were working food service jobs, and trying to get through school. Some things never change, but thank God the cooking and waitressing are behind us, eh? We've been through a lot together--for richer or poorer, and sickness and oh, well relative (mental) health. Now you're sticking with me through all this food BS, well, I'm just so grateful. I'm afraid you'll wake up one day and say "she's one f'ed up chick, I can do better" cuz you probably can. But thanks for not looking.
I truly do think you're the best and wouldn't want to do all this without you. I love how you just listen (tune me out perhaps?) to me babble about school and clinicals, and all the crazy people I deal with every day. I love how you just let me vent about social workers and the kids. I love how you never tell me I'm wrong but just let me get it all out and work it out for myself.
My love, my confidante, my stud muffin, you're the other half of my heart, the part that makes me whole.
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There is always some madness in love. But there is also always some reason in madness.
--Friedrich Nietzsche (1844 - 1900), "On Reading and Writing"
They started arriving as I started reading. They are such a myriad of colors that rainbows are in awe. They are little more than tiny, but there are just so many. Hundreds upon thousands keep filling my cube. They are so soft, and furry…and warm. Every last one has a huge smile that beams happiness. There must be a million here now, its making it hard to keep reading as these funny little fuzzy creatures keep hugging me. For such small little things they sure do huge tight. If you could see into my space, you couldn’t even see me any more; I am just covered with warm fuzzy hugs.
I feel lucky and I feel loved.
THANKS
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